Worrying again

Well, what a week this has been – there have been good bits but as usual the bad bits stick in my mind more. The main bad bit is the anxious feeling that I have had since last Saturday when I feel a bit lightheaded while making scones. Since then my mind has been in overdrive but at the beginning of the week I was trying to control it and I really thought I had nipped it in the bud. Unfortunately I haven’t because from last night I started to feel really tired and anxious, which normally makes me feel lightheaded. When I got up this morning I thought well, I feel OK so I got ready for work and everything was fine until I was walking from Fenchurch Street to Tower Hill and I looked one way at something and then all of a sudden I felt dizzy and hot. Basically, I think I had a panic attack so that set off the day to a bad start.

All day I have felt so heavy-headed and weird that even now I don’t feel right but better for just being home. I’m not sure why I get like this. I think it might be a mixture of things – stress, tiredness, worry about illness, bad posture at my desk. My friend Jo said that I might be the type of person who needs regular holidays to keep these thoughts and stresses at bay. My next holiday isn’t until mid-August with a weekend away to the Lake District but with tomorrow off work I’m hoping I can chill out and relax before travelling back to work on Monday. I really need to work out why this happens and how to stop it getting this bad again.

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